EURO BLUES
by Dale Connelly, 9/29/00

Dc: This is DCR, it's not the news. People who follow international currency trading are concerned about the Euro, the relatively new currency of the European Monetary Union. Eleven countries use the Euro and its value has been dropping. Recently the G7 nations staged an "intervention" to "bolster" the Euro. We've invited Jurgen Schenck, the Associate Minister of Monetary Enthusiasm for the European Union to explain what's going on. Thanks for being here, Minister Schenck.

Jurgen: Yah yah.

Dc: What is wrong with the Euro?

Jurgen: Oh, nothing. Nothing is wrong.

Dc: The reaction of the industrialized nations suggests that something IS wrong. The Euro has lost value since it was introduced in January of '99.

Jurgen: Yah, well, you know ... it's very hard to compete. Everybody's always comparing. How is the Euro next to the Yen, next to the dollar ... every hour, every minute ... compare, compare.

Dc: There have to be constant comparisons made. For exchange rates.

Jurgen: Yah, well, when everybody else is bigger and stronger ...

Dc: The strong dollar in particular.

Jurgen: Yah, we're very puny next to the dollar. Just a little puny weakling.

Dc: (brightly) That makes Europe a very attractive travel destination for American tourists! And European goods are better bargains!

Jurgen: (so what) Yah, I suppose.

Dc: So until the balance changes, these are positive things!

Jurgen: I don't think the Euro will ever be the strength of the dollar.

Dc: Maybe it will!

Jurgen: No. I don't think so.

Dc: Oh, don't hang your head like that. Lift your chin up!

Jurgen: Nah.

Dc: It's not so bad.

Jurgen: Yah it is. Nobody likes the Euro.

Dc: A bunch of the industrialized nations just bought billions of them.

Jurgen: Yah, well, they had to. It's like when your mother paid kids to be your friend, eh?

Dc: You're making me feel bad here.

Jurgen: Why so bad? You get paid in the dollars, don't you? Then quit complaining.

Dc: It amazes me that you were chosen to be the "Associate Minister of Monetary Enthusiasm."

Jurgen: Yah. I got the short straw.

Dc: So it doesn't have anything to do with actual ... enthusiasm.

Jurgen: You should see the others. They call me "Smiley."

Dc: Jurgen Schenck, head cheerleader for the European Monetary Union and the Euro, as it goes through some rough times.

Dale Connelly Reporting Home