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PSYCHIC PETS
by Dale Connelly, 12/1/00

Dc: The work of biologist and animal trainer Howard Myers has received a lot of attention lately as people warm to the idea that their pets may have psychic abilities beyond the power of humans.

Dr. Myers has come to the studio with his famous psychic dog Skipper.

Thanks for making time for us, I know you have a busy schedule with Good Morning America, 20/20 and the Porpah Finney Show all clamoring for time.

Myers: Glad to be here. Skipper here told me that he pictured himself on this show. Isn't that right, boy?

Skipper: Woof woof!

Dc: He had a premonition?

Myers: Sure. Just in the same way he knows when I'm coming home. Mrs. Myers tells me that Skipper will sit by the window and watch for me, and within ten or fifteen minutes I pull into the driveway, every time!

Dc: Maybe your schedule is predictable enough that...

Myers: No, no no. This has happened at all different times. Unpredictable hours. Going on all these TV talk shows with Skipper really upsets the old schedule. After we were on Nightline, I went into the office and worked until 6am and then came home, and there was Skipper waiting for me, just like always. Right boy?

Skipper: Woof Woof!

Dc: Good dog. Do you think he might just hear you coming at a distance?

Myers: Not ten minutes before I show up. We've figured that Skipper goes to the window just about the time I'm shutting down the computer and gathering up my things.

Dc: That would suggest a...

Skipper: Woof woof woof!

Myers:... that it suggests an ability to read brain waves at a distance, to communicate telepathically. That's right boy. Good dog!

Dc: He's finishing my sentences for me?

Myers: Sorry. That's really not polite, Skipper! Shame!

Dc: I have to admit, I'm amazed.

Myers: You should have seen Ted Koppel. He was really stunned.

Dc: You were on Nightline?

Myers: Skipper predicted that the election would be a toss up. And he predicted the Florida Supreme Court decision. Didn't you boy?

Skipper: Woof woof!

Dc: Does he have anything to say about what happens next?

Myers: Depends on what you wanna know?

Dc: Who will take the oath of office on January 20th?

Myers: Skipper... Got the question? Predict!

Skipper: Bush! Bush!

Dc: He's saying Bush?

Myers: He is saying Bush.

Dc: So Bush really did win Florida.

Myers: Not so fast. Skipper, who won Florida?

Skipper: Gorrrrrrrrre.

Dc: Gore?

Skipper: Gorrrrrrrrre.

Dc: So your psychic dog is saying that even though he thinks Gore...

Skipper: Gorrrrrrrre.

Dc:... actually won in Florida, Bush will be sworn in?

Skipper: Bush Bush Bush.

Myers: That's what he says.

Dc: And he's non partisan?

Myers: Skipper? Sure. Take a walk with us sometime. You'll see, he contributes to everyone. Everywhere.

Dc: So how will that work out, Skipper? What about 2004?

Skipper: Ralf! Ralf!

Dc: Ha! He's saying the President will have a rough time.

Skipper: Ralf! Ralf!

Myers: No he's not. Listen! He's saying Ralph!

Dc: He is?

Myers: He's always liked the underdog.

Dc: Howard Myers and his psychic dog Skipper.

 

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