Antiques Roadshow
May 2, 2003

Listen (How to Listen)

(sfx: heavy object being dragged on)

Beth Gilleland: Pardon me? Young man? Can someone to take a look at my pot?

Dale Connelly: I beg your pardon?

BG: For the show. You're with the public broadcasting? I've been sitting on this pot over 30 years. Ever since the factory closed. Now I don't know what it's worth, but that's not important.

DC: I'm sorry you've come all this way for nothing, but ... this isn't The Antiques Road Show. This is public radio.

BG: Oh ... I've never listened to public radio before now.

Jim Ed Poole: A first-time listener? Welcome to the show, ma'am! Put that up here and let's take a look at it.

BG: Thank goodness I got through to the right people.

DC: But this isn't the ...

JEP: ... isn't the TV Antiques Road Show ... it's the radio version!

BG: This will look even better on radio. (effort) ... Here it is!

(sfx: big thunk)

DC: That's an enormous piece of stonewear.

BG: It weighs 80 pounds. Keeps me fit, dragging it around town. But I'm sweating like a pig. Good thing there aren't cameras, I won't have to freshen up for the part where you tell me what it's worth!

JEP: And this piece looks very special! Have you had it appraised yet?

BG: Well, no!

JEP: So you have no idea what it's worth!

BG: No, and it's staying in the family no matter what! Are we talking about four figures?

DC: We don't actually have any expertise ...

JEP: Let's not get too far ahead of ourselves, OK? Why don't you tell us a few things about this piece. Has it been in your family a long time?

BG: Oh yes. The first person in the family who owned this was my Aunt Fanny. She was acquainted with a gentleman who worked in the factory and I believe this water jug was a gift from him to her, given on the occasion of him telling her he was already married, which broke her heart and made her miserable for the rest of her life.

JEP: That's just a wonderful story.

BG: I guess he thought a great big heavy jug would make everything OK. I don't know what it held at first. Aunt Fanny would have appreciated Vodka, according to the stories I've heard.

JEP: Where do you think this ceramic masterwork came from?

BG: I assume it's Red Wing pottery.

JEP: Ah, but it's not.

BG: It's not?

JEP: I've seen it happen time and again where people think they have one, but they don't. However, the story is no less interesting. Let me tell you a few things about this piece that may surprise you. This "jug" as you call it, actually dates back to the Ming Dynasty.

BG: In China?

JEP: The one and only. And the glaze on it is very special. Have you ever heard of Krispy Kreme donuts?

BG: I ate a bag of them on the way here.

JEP: It's the very same glaze, but a commercial grade.

BG: Isn't that interesting!

JEP: The handles may look very ordinary but they were modeled after the handlebar moustache of William Howard Taft, one of the fattest presidents of the United States of America!

BG: I thought they looked familiar.

JEP: And this is one of the first ever FLAT bottomed jugs that were made. Before this time ... about 30 million B.C. ... jugs were typically made with rounded bottoms and they didn't hold as much water because they kept tipping over.

BG: That was a good idea they had, to flatten it.

JEP: It was a very important development that kept people from dehydrating.

BG: This is a significant jug, then.

JEP: There aren't many that combine the qualities I've listed.

BG: I should say not!

JEP: I'll bet you're wondering what it's worth. Care to guess?

BG: I wouldn't know where to begin. But that's not important to me because it's family and we'd never sell it. Unless it was more than a million. It's not, is it?

JEP: This jug ... would bring you ... on the open market ... at least ... $59.

BG: (under whelmed) Really.

JEP: Are you surprised?

BG: Well yes ... I thought it would be ... a lot more. Being 30 million years old, and all, with the Ming dynasty and the Taft handles.

JEP: There are a lot of them on the market right now, and that's driving the price down, but since you plan to hang on to it anyway, there may come a time when it would fetch a higher price. It's in excellent condition!

BG: Well thank you.

JEP: I hope you'll take it home and keep it in a place of honor.

BG: We've been putting it under the back steps since Watergate. And for a lot of those years we didn't pay any attention to the public broadcasting and had no idea you had shows like this. So I'm really grateful for your help and I'll try to do what you say.

JEP: Well I do have something to ask of you. Promise you'll do it?

BG: I dunno.

JEP: I think you should have it professionally cleaned up and you should bring it in the house. Will you do that for me?

BG: Sure! That's bound to be cheaper than one of those expensive memberships, which is what I thought you were gonna ask me to do.

JEP: Ah! Speaking of memberships, here's the best part ... as a brand new member you can join right now for only $5 a month, and get all the benefits of a $120-dollar membership for only $60!

BG: Seriously? I never expected that! Are you sure?

JEP: Right now and for a limited time only. In fact the offer ends today! See what a great deal you got by dragging your old pot down here?

BG: (doing mental calculation) Will you take my Ming Dynasty water jug in trade for a membership? So I don't have to carry it out of here?

JEP: (gladly) No we won't! You're one dollar short, and we don't trade.

DC: We prefer credit cards. See the people out in front, and thanks.

(sfx: heavy object being dragged off)

BG: (fading) All right then. Sorry about the floor.